Why yes, I was a theater kid growing up (for no one asking). And if you got that Rent: The Musical reference, I love you. Perhaps they were on to something when writing that score:

In daylights, in sunsets
In midnights, in cups of coffee
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife
In five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes
How do you measure, a year in the life?

When I left my job many months ago, I was confident that my professional achievements, my quick career growth, and my several awards would be enough to land me my next big opportunity in no time. Why would I leave my ‘dream job’ otherwise (for that story, reference Blog Post #2 – the very reason, Brooklyn and Boy was born)?

But two separate forces were at play that turned days into weeks into months. Initially, I was picky to a fault in search of this mythical role. My checklist of things that had to be true for me to even consider a conversation was endless. I look back on the many conversations I turned down and the several offers I didn’t accept because they didn’t feel like the ‘perfect’ next role. In hindsight, and after months of brain searching, I realize that the balance was off in what I was looking for. My focus was on the company, the title, the prestige (all of which are obviously important considerations) because that would reinforce my sense of self-worth and purpose. But what I later realized is if I found ways to detangle these things from my work, because there were so many other ways in which I could invest in and nurture myself, the whole journey changed course.

Then, I found myself in the middle of a global pandemic. For a strict planner like me, who works off of lists and timelines and checklists, I quickly learned that you can’t plan for the unknown and the effect something like a global pandemic will have on a job hunt will cripple even the strongest person with the best organizational systems lol.

So I thought I’d take a moment to write out the lessons I’ve learned- as a reminder that I can come back to if I ever find myself in a similar situation or if I am doubting my path, but also as an assurance for others that may be going through tough times that you are not alone and you are stronger than you give yourself credit for.

• Lesson 1 | Not all heroes wear capes.

  When I think about the past months, there is one thing that I am so incredibly thankful for – and that is the support of every single one of the badass women and men in my life. Nimesh, my parents, my sister, Minela, Ruchi, Era, Lourdes, Kristin, Christine, Sarah, Parul, Sonu, Shiv, Anika, Stef, Nidhi, Neelu, Swati, my BIL Parth, and my other BIL Ronak, Omar (I will edit this everyday until I capture every last person that supported me). Beyond having all of their own shit to deal with, they made the time to connect me to the right people, to listen to my concerns and fears, to check in with me periodically, to send me a text the morning of a big interview wishing me good luck.

  A special shoutout goes to ‘Boy’ – my husband, Nimesh. Not only was he supportive of my decisions (emotionally and financially) initially, but he went to work every single day as an essential worker in this global pandemic to ensure that his employees, his family, and the people he supplied PPE to were taken care of. I will forever be grateful to the fact that he carried that weight on his shoulders and never once made me feel the lesser for it.  He was patient and supportive through it all, and for that, I am very lucky.

  I may never have the words to express to all of them how much their attention, support, and love meant to me, but I sure as hell could not have done this without them and will try my best to be the best friend that I can be in any situation that I can be there for them. I could sing their praises forever, but I will keep this one short and sweet – make time for the ones you love, tell them frequently how much they mean to you and how amazing they are, pay it forward ALWAYS, because you just never know how much your help and support can help someone in their journey towards something better, bigger, or simply on the next chapter in their life.

• Lesson 2 | Be your best self, even if you feel your worst.

  The world is as small as it is big. You never know when you will run into people, on the job, at a restaurant, in an interview, through a friend. Carry yourself with poise, be kind, send the thank you note (even if you know they will never read it), but stand for what you believe in and for what you believe you deserve. I will never forget the one time, on a particularly low Tuesday, when I unleashed on a recruiter who I felt was not being honest and open with me on the status of a few roles. We exchanged a few very heated emails- I know, I know, there will always be a paper trail of this convo- so I am pretty sure I will never be considered for a job there ever again. Oops.

  For those particularly rough Mondays, drink your coffee and reference #MondayMood. I created #MondayMood to give myself the boost that I needed heading into a new week and it seems as though it wasn’t just me that needed it. You know who you are, and I will continue to do #MondayMood for all of us.

  For those particularly rough mornings, I discovered the power of starting your morning with positive affirmations. I know I am not the only one who reaches for my phone the moment I wake up. I would open my eyes, grab my phone, and click on my IG, email, and/or calendar. I got out of bed every morning feeling slightly more grumpy than when I woke up (and I’m a morning person!). I realized the power of spending those first few seconds after you open your eyes stating 1 thing you are grateful for. Half the time I don’t even remember what I said, but what I do know is I started getting out of bed feeling positive – feeling a sense of recognition for what I did have instead of what I didn’t, to get me through the day.

  For those particularly rough interviews, just have wine in close proximity to your desk. That and cauli pizza crusts – so you can have the comfort food in pizza that you were craving without feeling worse about yourself the next morning.

  For those particularly unexpected and life-altering global pandemics, wear your mask and exercise. Your body will thank you for the endorphins it was so desperately searching for. If I could take up running (my fastest mile is 18 minutes and I have never run on anything besides a treadmill in an air-conditioned gym in my life), then you can get physical too. Find your movement of choice, wear your mask, and stick to it every damn day.  

• Lesson 3 | Find your purpose.

  If I’ve learned anything in this time, it’s that having your purpose tied to your career is a very dangerous game. If you can tie those two things together, however, you are one of the lucky few. I feel like I’ve done a pretty good job at that in my professional life, but I sought out my entire purpose and passion in my job. It’s a dangerous game because at the end of the day, your career doesn’t owe you anything, it’s fleeting and fickle, it may be paying your bills one day and suddenly not the next. So do you want to be caught without a purpose AND a paycheck?! Find the balance in your life that allows you to do both. Identify the things that bring you joy. Save some energy and time for the things you love, outside of your professional life. Invest in yourself so you can keep doing both.

Because ultimately, when I look back on this (nearly a) year of recruiting in a global pandemic/social movement/election year, sure I will always remember the tears and the heartache. But what I will remember more is the time I took to invest in something deeply personal, both in my own daily practice of being present and grateful and kind to myself and in my pursuit of passions like writing and learning and creating.

For those of you wondering if this ‘hobby’ of mine will live on as I start work…it for damn sure will. Those 523 followers were hard earned and I will not let all those hours of learning how to build a website, creating a personal brand, and teaching myself photoshop go to waste. Above all, I am confident knowing that I return to the workforce with a creative outlet I can always lean on to keep my passions alive.